I have this thing that I do where I sometimes sit on the bus or in the car (it's usually when I'm in a vehicle, it facilitates this process I think) and I think about what is right and what is wrong. I think about utility, which means what is good feels good and seems good and what is bad feels bad and seems bad. Then I think about deontology, which means that there's a rule that, if violated, means you've done bad, and if not violated, you've done good. I sit there and wonder sometimes how something so pleasurable like eating five gazillion Kit Kat Chunkys can be so right to a utilitarian, yet so wrong to a deontologist. At the same time, I remember reading about a kid who needed to eat like a gazillion calories a day because he was born three months premature, and so I suppose in a utility sense eating five gazillion Kit Kat Chunkys could be very wrong, and could be considered either wrong or right to a deontologist (gluttony vs. thou shalt not kill?).
I was on the bus today (see!) and reading The Shack, and I thought about utilitarianism vs. deontology. There's this part where Sarayu tells the protaganist that by deciding what is right is judging by your standards and not by God's. I remember having a conversation with Pastor Damien recently, who had this talk with someone he knew who said: "How can God judge what is wrong or right? I should be able to judge." Pastor Damien then responded with, "Well, I'm going to take this gun and put it to your head and shoot you," to which the person frantically replied, "No! That's wrong!" Pastor Damien explained that if people are able to decide for themselves what is wrong and what is right, then he should be given the right to decide if killing the guy was right or wrong.
So who judges?
I suppose God judges.
See, I have a problem with that. Before you attack me, let me just backtrack and say that I feel like God is just a rule. I am not ready to accept the terms of his limitations yet, and I don't feel like my relationship with him is strong enough for him to break the bonds that surround my heart. I feel a strong attachment to those things I like and feel are good things - I feel that I am a good person by nature and so I won't overstep those boundaries anyways, but I'm sure in God's eyes I am no perfect individual and am probably going to Hell. At the same time, I also understand the need for rules, because without rules any Hitler or Stalin can go traipsing about thinking they're right. Definitions need to be made to clarify what is right and what is wrong.
So here is where I stand. I believe in God, but I don't give myself to him entirely. I don't believe in utility. I do, however, believe that a deontological viewpoint can be the only way I can perceive the world and live by it, but unfortunately this view does not include Christianity within its set. I do find Emmanuel Kant's words very attractive in that I think I could live with a categorical imperative, which is that you make a rule and ask if it could be applied to all of humanity, and if it can be done so without violating something very ethical, then it is a good rule.
I can live with being a Kantian, but I don't think all Kantians are going to Heaven. While I still know that God has a chance and that I am learning to embrace God slowly, I know that this Kantian isn't going to Heaven anytime (soon).
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
reading
now:
done:
the giveron a daily basis
the past
me likey
- brains
- communist daughter
- cool calm pete
- crosswords
- e.e. cummings
- green apple green tea
- how monstrously fast i type
- imogen heap
- jazzy jester, toyz & nasty ray
- lions
- lookbook
- m.c. escher
- Magdalene
- making corners
- metatheory
- monsters inc
- my earlobes
- palindromes
- primer
- radiohead
- ratatouille
- really colorful shoes
- sarah slean
- shelby & blacky
- steve reich
- stream of consciousness
- time traveller's wife
Posts
Hmm. I’m in no position to comment because I’m a very elementary, inexperienced Christian so please take my comments with a grain of salt.
ReplyDeleteIn response to your third paragraph: I don’t think God is just a rule. He’s a friend, a dad, a being...someone who loves people. He may have rules but I don’t think his purpose is to set rules. His terms are not to limit but to help us love and be better people and to love him. I think the Kantian ideology fails in some aspects- not everything can be universalized, and everything that is universalized may not necessarily be “good”. On the other hand, I think God’s “rules” are in some way congruent with that of a kantian’s....and if they aren’t then I think this could be another limitation of the Kantian ideology. If you take his rules and universalize them I think a Kantian couldn’t argue against them. I guess we’d have to think of examples. I don’t think he wants you to break the bonds that surround your heart because I think he puts them there...I think that’s how he speaks to us. I think we need him because sometimes those boundaries aren’t clear...sometimes right and wrong isn’t clear...and I think we need him to help us through those decision. I think that even though we may choose the wrong answer we need someone to forgive us so that we can continue to love without holding back. We are all imperfect ....i don’t think we will all go to hell. I think it is our heart that matters and I think that he’s the only one that knows what’s in our hearts. I think living a life as a Kantian without God would be self-limiting....I couldn’t find love or continue to love or find peace. I think there are many religions/theories/ideologies that all have similar rules of love and being a good person. But I think being a Christian means admitting that you may be wrong, admitting that we can’t do this alone, having humility, having someone to take on the burden of feeling inadequate, someone to forgive our mistakes. I think being a Christian means believing in Him and allowing him to love us.
I think its a growing process to give yourself to god entirely. I’m sure many don’t ever reach that point. As a Kantian, you may choose to do everything right-...in terms of how you or how “everyone” would define it but then what? Isn’t there more to life than that? I think passion, love, happiness are things that can only be truly experienced with God. Without forgiveness there is guilt...frankly i think I would go crazy if I had to face this world by myself. I need him to guide me and to forgive me.
I think the fact that you believe in him, and pray to him, and that you talk to him, and think about him...well I think that he sees all of this. All I know is that He loves us and he wants us to take a risk and love him too.
Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. You're right, I think I meant to say that God has rules, not that God is the rule, but I think the meaning still came across the same, I'm not sure? I also think you misunderstood what I meant by bonds on my heart, I meant bonds in terms of being limited in fully loving God because I haven't allowed him full access.
I'm not saying Kantians aren't in alignment with God's outline of how we should live, in fact I think there are many similarities. I do also see how having a relationship with him is very important, and that it's an extension of being good rather than a limitation of it.
As you say, many learn to devote themselves to God and many fail to achieve it. I guess that I was just disappointed - I feel like a high jumper who has trained and trained and still can't clear that mark. Don't get me wrong, I know that learning to love God isn't a race or a contest, rather I feel like it's a personal journey that has unlimited spiritual rewards. I just want to be able to say it out loud and not be lying to myself, you know?
So for now, I suppose I am where I am.
The one thing that troubles me - how does God decide if us imperfect beings go to hell or not? If so, then what happens to people who say, "Yes, I accept God into my life and Jesus as my personal savior", follow a life of lukewarm to cold Christianity, and simply repent and repent and repent? Are they weighed higher than those who think about God all the time, but never say yes to his love?